Jealousy

One of my twin mom friends wrote a blog post titled "Green Eyed Monster" at http://www.goddessinprogressblog.com/2011/06/the-green-eyed-monster/ and without sounding like I have totally copied her post, her words totally resonated with me!  Even though I was very lucky and was able to get pregnant very easily both times that I tried, neither pregnancy went the way I expected.  My first pregnancy, I ended up on bed rest with pre-eclampsia at 32 weeks.  I was hoping to go totally natural and let my body tell me when it was ready to go into labor.  That plan went away when I was induced at 38 weeks.  I ended up going into labor on my own and didn't require any medication until my contractions slowed and my son somehow got stuck.  needless to say, I ended up with a c-section and then on magnesium sulfate.  Breast feeding was pretty much a no go.  He didn't take to it like I had hoped and wasn't gaining weight, so I ended up attempting to breast feed, supplement with formula, and pumping every 2 hours for a while until his doctor felt like he was gaining weight appropriately.  By then I was pregnant again, he was only 3 months old.  I figured here was my second chance.  Then 2 months later we found out it was twins.  Once again I ended up on bed rest, this time for 3 months.  I was hoping for a VBAC, but again my body didn't cooperate.  My son was breech and he was babyB and the bigger of the 2 (come to find out he was all of 2 oz bigger) and I wasn't able to go for a VBAC ( I also had pre-eclampsia again).  They were 5 weeks early and didn't exactly take to breast feeding.  After having a full term baby that didn't gain weight after breast feeding and knowing that my twins were on high calorie formula when they got formula, I was too worried to breast feed.  Then they ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks and on an even higher calorie formula.  Having 3 babies under 1 with some calorie issues was not conducive to anxiety free breast feeding.

I had my tubes tied after I had my twins.  My husband and I decided that 2 difficult pregnancies was enough.  We had 3 beautiful babies  and didn't need to chance things again.  As much as I know it was the right decision, I still sometimes long for a "normal" pregnancy with no issues after birth.  I long to be able to go into labor on my own.  I long to be able to breast feed my child.  These are things that I will never experience and when I see others having this experience, I feel like I lost out and didn't get what others get to experience.  When I get like this, I often remind myself that I have 3 beautiful children that are healthy and even though my pregnancies and their births as well as the first few months after they were born, I am extremely lucky to have them in my life and we all just have to deal with what nature gives us.  I certainly could have experienced worse issues and could have lost any and all of my babies due to health complications, but some one was watching over me and them and kept  all of us safe!  And for that, I am truly and extremely grateful!

Amy

Pre-eclampsia

May is Preeclampsia Month

I was one of the lucky ones and was able to get pregnant as soon as we started trying.  My pregnancy was going along perfect.  I had the normal morning sickness during the first trimester and pretty much at the start of the second trimester it was over.  Things went along great.  I was gaining weight just like I was supposed to.  All of a sudden, just before 32 weeks, I was at a routine OB appointment and I was put on bed rest because of high blood pressure.  I had no symptoms, but my blood pressure was high and I had gained a little extra weight.  I had to go back to the OB after the weekend and was immediately sent to the hospital for a week and then sent home on bed rest for the remainder of my pregnancy.  I was to lie on my left side and only get up to go to the bathroom.  I was able to hold on until week 38 when I was induced and after laboring and then pushing for 3 hours with little to no results, even though the nurse said I was pushing perfectly.  My blood pressure continued to be a problem and then my son's heart rate started dropping.  My OB decided that I needed a c-section and my son was born almost 11 hours after my water broke.  I continued to have high blood pressure and increased swelling so I was lucky enough to get magnesium sulfate to help with the extra fluid and my blood pressure.  I was supposed to be on it for 24 hours, but I had to be taken off early because I was having too many side effects and wasn't able to get enough oxygen in my system.  The day of my discharge, the covering OB wasn't sure that she wanted to discharge me due to my continuing high blood pressure.  After coming into my room and seeing me sobbing, she decided that I would be better off at home and made me promise to call if I had any symptoms of preeclampsia or if my blood pressure continued to be high even with out any symptoms and I needed to see my OB in the morning.  All went well and I continued on my blood pressure medication with no issues.

3 months after giving birth, I found out I was pregnant again.  We were ecstatic.  We started trying right away,never thinking we would have a baby that quick.  11 weeks into the pregnancy, we found out we were having twins.  OMG, I had a 5 month old and I found out I was going to have twins with my due date being 1 week before my older son turned 1.  I continued on my blood pressure medication and my pregnancy went along great until week 23, when at a routine ultrasound appointment, I found out my cervix was too short.  I was placed on bed rest again and had to figure out how to take care of myself while having a baby who was only 7 1/2 months when I went on bed rest.  I had a couple of scares, but I think most of that was due to me being nervous.  I made it to week 35 when at a routine OB visit, I was told that I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced.  My OB told me that she wouldn't be surprised if I went into labor over the weekend.  I was a little nervous that I wouldn't know what it was like to go into labor on my own, but I figured, my body would tell me what to do.  Unfortunately, while at a routine non-stress test that afternoon, my blood pressure was 188/111 even though I was on blood pressure medication.  Along with that, I had protein in my  urine and my labs were off.  They decided it would be best for me to deliver the babies that night.  I was hoping for a VBAC if Baby B (Thomas) was vertex.  On Wednesday he was vertex, but just to make sure they did an ultrasound.  Only 2 days later, my Thomas, how was always moving had turned breech again and I was off for another c-section.  Thankfully, this time I did not need the magnesium sulfate.  I had 2 little babies who were born 5 weeks early and an older son who was 10 1/2 months.  My twins did great.  They were able to suck, swallow, and breathe, their heart rate stayed stable, and they were able to maintain their body temperature.  Thankfully they were able to come home with me when I was discharged 5 days after giving birth.

I received my preeclampsia foundation news letter today and found out, or should I say confirmed that women who had preeclampsia were more at risk for heart disease up to 15 year after giving birth.  I have always been concerned with my risk for heart disease since my only uncle died or heart disease when he was only 42, just 4 years older than I am now.  I really need to get my act together and start getting in shape.  Not only do I have a family history of heart disease, but now I have the added risk of 2 pregnancies with preeclampsia.

Amy

On Having Preemies

I hope sotorrifictwins.blogspot.com doesn't mind that I'm stealing her idea for a blog post, but any support for preemies is good, right?  I am also a mom to preemie twins born 4 weeks and 3 days early, according to a later ultrasound time line (according to usual calculating, and I guess later ultrasound timelines aren't as accurate, I was 5 weeks  3 days early).  Does it matter?  In the long run not really, but being at least 35 weeks allowed me to deliver at Mt Auburn like I wished.  Unfortunately, I did not have the uncomplicated pregnancy like Sotorrific Twins.  I had been on bed rest since week 23 and got steroid shots at 28 weeks for help with the babies lung development.  Like Sotorrific Twins said, it is so important to have prenatal care.  I was at a routine ultrasound when the ultrasound tech and MD noticed that I had a short cervix placing me at risk for pre-term labor.  The MD immediately put me on bed rest after a trip to the hospital for initial monitoring.  I was also put on progesterone suppositories.  I was seen much more often for OB appointments and also for ultrasounds.  The initial goal was for me to make it to at least 28 weeks.  Those next 5 weeks were really scary, hoping and praying that my babies would be safe.  Once I hit 34 weeks, the ultrasound MD told us just how worried he was.

At that point, I was taken off strict bed rest but still had increased monitoring.  It was at a routine NST that I had found out I was having issues with pre-eclampsia again (I was on bed rest for 6 weeks with my 1st son).  At my OB appointment that morning my blood pressure was totally normal, no issues.  By 4 pm, my BP had spiked to 188/111 (I was also on BP meds) and blood work and urine showed that I was truly starting to have pre-eclampsia.  I was going to try to do a VBAC, but baby B was breech (he had been head down 2 days earlier).  I had already started to dilate and they were going to try to break my water, but no go since I had a breech baby.

The babies were born just before midnight via c-section and were amazingly healthy.  They were both about 4 1/2 pounds and really only needed to be watched for their ability to suck, swallow and breathe.  We were lucky enough to be able to have them come home with us after 5 days.  Unfortunately, their low birth weight, small size and premature status placed them at risk for RSV.  Really unfortunately, they came down with RSV when they were 2 and 3 weeks old.

Like Sotorrific Twins, I also worry about meeting milestones at the right mark, but so far there have not been any issues.  Because of their RSV, I tend to be a little more worried regarding respiratory issues, they are more at risk for issues due to RSV.  H1N1 as well as the regular flu, is also a worry because of their preemie status and RSV history.

Thankfully, RSV is the only issue that we have had related to their preemie status and even then once they were stablized, they just grew and grew and reached milestone after milestone.  Luckily my BP is now normal and I am no longer on BP meds.

Prenatal monitoring is so important to your baby's health and well being as well as your own.  Make sure that you take care of yourself and get monitored when you are pregnant.  As you can see even with close monitoring, there can be major issues, but they can be addressed quickly.

Amy