Michael

I finally bit the bullet and made an appointment to have Michael evaluated to see if there is more to his speech delay.  I am hoping that I am just being overly worried and that they will say that he is just behind and will catch up.  At this point, I do think there is more to his speech delay and since he is four, I want to have him evaluated so that he can receive more services if he needs them.  The irony is that my husband was the one who was initially concerned, and now that his fears are alleviated somewhat, mine have increased.  My husband is a teacher and has seen kids with autism, I don't really have experience with childhood development.  If you were to ask me about dementia related issues, I could probably tease that out and see a lot of warning signs, but not childhood developmental issues.  For example, I definitely picked up on the fact that my grandmother was showing signs of dementia long before I was told that she was actually diagnosed with it.  My background is in nursing homes and geriatrics so I definitely fee comfortable with watching for those signs, not things like autism.  Do I think that he has autism?  Honestly, I don't think he does, but I am starting to realize that there are some really mild forms of autism or PDD NOS that some people wouldn't even diagnose as PDD NOS.  I do think that there is more to his speech delay, but I don't know what.  I guess that is why he is being evaluated.  I know that he will be evaluated by a pediatric neurologist from MGH and that the evaluation will be play oriented, but that is all.  I am looking forward to having this evaluation so that I am no longer worrying if there is an issue.  I am concerned that there is an issue, but at least knowing that there is an issue will be better than wondering.  Once I know if there is an issue I can hopefully learn what else I can do for Michael and what other services he is entitled to.

It's going to be a long couple of months til May 15th, but I am so happy that it is only a month and a half until the evaluation.  I have heard that it can take up to 6 months to get an appointment so I am happy.  I am also happy that we are meeting with the doctor 1 week later to discuss the results!

Amy

On Being a Previvor

If you didn't know, I recently found out that I am a "previvor".    A previvor is a term, I believe, that was founded by force.com to designate a term for people who are positive for the BRCA gene.  I now am faced with the decision to have prophylactic surgeries to remove my ovaries and my breasts.  This has been something that I have thought about for the last couple of months.  I had started thinking about it before I got tested, but the reality of this is just finally hitting me.  Last night was really the first time that I allowed myself to break down.  I was out doing my walk/run and in the middle of it, I broke down and started crying.  I started talking to my husband about what happened and he said I really need to do research and figure out what I need to do for me and that he will support me in what ever decision I make.

If you couldn't tell by the name of this blog, I believe in living a more natural life, but I also believe that there is a balance that needs to happen when living a natural life.  This decision is one area that I believe needs to be balanced.  I don't think that it is an easy decision to make: to either have surgery to remove parts of my body, that for a lot of women including me, are part of who we are as women or to use more alternative means to prevent cancer, breast and ovarian.  Right now I am leaning to not doing surgery with the potential of maybe having my ovaries out, but not having my breasts removed.  I have felt that this was going to be the way that I would go from the beginning, but I am scared of making the wrong decision and getting cancer and leaving my husband and 3 young children before it is time all because I made the wrong decision.

The New Year's goals that I have written about are based a lot on my BRCA2 + status.  I think that if I can work harder on these goals and actually meet them or at least continue working on them, I have a good chance of preventing cancer.  There is a lot of writing out there about having a gene and getting cancer.  There is also some information on how your genes are not your destiny.  I am hoping that I can make changes to my life to help change my genetic destiny.  I need to do a ton of research, and I need to find people who are on the same page as I am.  I haven't really figured out how to find these people, but I am hoping that there may be a group that I can find, maybe a support group type forum that actually meets in person.  I love that the internet allows for all sorts of info, but I really want to meet people and talk to professionals in person.  

Wish me luck on my research endeavors!

Amy

LIFE!!!!

Lately, there have been lots of ups and downs in our family's life.  Some of the ups include oh so much better sleep.  Pretty much every night between 6:30-6:45 we start our bedtime routine.  At one point, the routine was way too complicated.  I've basically pared it down to either bath time or washing up/brushing teeth, diaper changes/toilet time, 2 books, and maybe a song.  We are usually complete with lights out before 7:15.  Usually, the kids are asleep before 7:30, at least the twins are.  Michael, on the other hand, needs his own wind down time by himself one the twins are asleep.  He is usually asleep by 8:00 sometimes a little later.  This has made life so much easier.  I love bedtime so much more now.

The twins have turned 3 and are no longer eligible for early intervention due to age, but Eva Rose is getting speech once a week for articulation issues.  She amazes me though, and even the speech therapist mentioned it today.  She can say alligator pretty clearly, but she can't pronounce the ending of simple one syllable words like cat or cup.  Thomas is not receiving any services.  He is going to be watched, but he really doesn't need anything.  Michael continues to go to a preschool program for 5 hours.  His behavior seems to be testing limit setting at home and at school.  I think I am going to talk to his doctor about my concerns at his 4 year visit to see if there is anything that we should have him tested for, if not just to ease my own mind.

In the down department, we have had some big issues with a family member who has been living with us.  Life has been really stressful and we finally told him it was time to leave.  There are way to many things to write about why it was so stressful, but I am so looking forward to getting our house and life back in order!  I am not looking forward to the potential backlash from the family, but we needed to do what was right for our family not what was right for this family member.  I am hoping that my kids will be better off and I know that I will be better off!

It has been an extremely mild winter here north of Boston, but I still can't wait for spring.  I can't what to take the kids out and play.  I can't what to go hiking and walk the zoos and farms and ll those types of things.  I can't wait to start our garden again.  This year, I want to start planting our early spring plants on time and not wait til it is too late.

Amy

My Latest Projects (and a couple of pics of the twins)

I am trying to spend some time being creative and also using up some of the huge crafting stash that I have accumulated.  When I was looking at some of the things I thought about getting rid of, I realized that they were actually completed projects (if I was just a little creative in how I saw them), they just needed the finishing touches.  I weaved in some ends, and Voila!!!!, a baby Belle granny square afghan and a granny square afghan for Eva Rose.  Now on to using up some yarn stash to make the boys an afghan.

Eva Rose with her new afghan

Eva Rose's Baby Belle's afghan

The twins!

Amy

Healthier Me

I've been joining in with another twin mom to challenge myself to get healthier. The first two weeks were rough, but I think I'm on my way way, at least with the exercising. The first week. My daughter was sick and then I got sick the second week. Finally, the third week, I am feeling more myself and was able to do 90 minutes of running/walking. I am down about 5 pounds and weigh less than I did when I got married and pregnant with Michael. Now I need to start doing some strength training and getting my food intake under control. Some days, I think that I want to run/walk more than every other day. I've been doing great drinking my green smoothies. I'd love to do a couple of days of detox smoothies just to see how I feel. I really need to cut out sugar, carbs, and fat, and even coffee.

Given the fact that I have decided not to pursue surgery for my BRCA2 gene positive status, it's really important to me to change my lifestyle. I need to continue to exercise, eat better, and deal with stress better. I realize that just because I have the gene, it does not mean that I will get cancer, but given that my great grandmother, my grandmother (who died of breast cancer), and my mom have all had cancer and my mom is also positive for BRCA2 gene,my chances of not getting cancer seem slim. I really need to do all I can to be healthy so that even if I do get cancer, my body is strong.

I really need to stop drinking coffee. I have switched to decaf, but I really want off coffee all together. I just bought some new tea. I have been trying to go from coffee to tea. Part of the issue is that I really like going for a ride with the kids and getting a cup of coffee. I think that I just need to let go of buying the coffee and bring my tea.

The other thing I am doing to get healthy is to get a little more organized and be better at cleaning my house. It will be an ongoing project, but one that I really need to keep working on. Some days, I think that I have some form of ADD, but hen other times I think I just need to be better organized and everything will be fine. I feel like if I get better organized, my stress levels will be better. Overall, if my stress levels are better, I will be better.

It slow going, but I feel like I am my way to doing what I need to do. I'm really glad I joined in with this challenge!

Amy

Pictures

At the zoo

for a walk

reflections

Trying for a hug

The twins

My 3 kids

Michael

Eva Rose

Thomas

Being silly

Illness and Other Things

I have been fighting a cold/bronchitis since Thanksgiving.  Finally, I went to the doctors 3 weeks ago and got the Z-pak for bronchitis and was feeling so much better.  I was feeling great for about 2 weeks and then my daughter got sick just before her 3rd birthday.  She was miserable this past weekend.  The poor thing was sick on her birthday party and her actual birthday, though she started feeling better on her actual birthday.  I brought her to the doctor who felt that her fever was related to a virus and that it would just have to work it's way out of her system.  He gave me some things to strengthen her immune system and help her body do what it needs to do to help her get better.  She was fine the next day but guess who is using everything that she was told to use?  I am once again sick.  I am using the echinacea, the vitamin C and vitamin D and am hoping that I will start feeling better soon.  I also need to start using  my nasal rinse as well as eating better and probably starting my allergy shots again.

I started a Biggest Loser type program with another twin mom blogger.  I have lost a little weight, but given the illness here, I have not exercised anywhere near where I should be.  I am going to try to get on the treadmill today since I really am not sure who I feel about being out in the cold when I am sick or with my daughter who was recently sick.  I am hopeful that I can at least use this challenge to lose a little bit of weight and get myself on the right track.  Losing weight is so much harder when you have kids.

Here's a few birthday party pictures:

Sick birthday girl!

Birthday boy!

Big Brother

Birthday Cake Nonna made

Birthday Cake from Costco

In another month and a half, we'll be celebrating Michael's 4th birthday, but for now we are a house of 3, three year olds!  Hopefully no one will be sick for Michael's birthday!

Amy